Will to win, where do I find it?

     My god, how I hate taking a shower, but then again, I absolutely love taking a shower. I suppose the correct thing to say is, 'I hate that my mind thinks of awesome ideas while I'm in the shower'. Yup, sounds about right. Here it is, 5:00 A.M. and well, thanks to my beautiful infection, I'm awake. Getting almost 24 hours of sleep, with little to no break really fucks up your sleep pattern. 

     I've had a Kindle Fire, for about a year now, and for the most part, I haven't really read many things on it, not because I didn't want to, or because I didn't have any eBooks I waned to read but, mainly because in a way I didn't feel like it was mine. I bought it off Ebay just to see if I could get a bill me later account and sure enough, they sent it to me, wham bam thank you credit score for moderately improving. Alas, it took me an entire year to pay it off because of the dreaded intro offer of "zero payments, zero interest for six months." Oops, I forgot, to good to be true? Yup, once that six months is up, they are on you like you owe them.... Oh. Right. You do owe them money. 

     So now that I have MY kindle, signed, sealed and delivered and MINE(did I mention it was mine?) I am reading some biographies, and autobiographies by some of my favorite wrestlers.(Yes, it's fixed, yes I know, hows your favorite scripted drama/comedy/romance/medical etc. going? Oh, and at least the people I watch, do their own damn "stunts" which coincidentally rhymes with...) I am in the middle of Chris Jericho's second book, "Undisputed: How to become the world champion in 1,372 easy steps". His first was "A Lion's Tale:Around the World in Spandex" Having read multiple other wrestler biographies, these two so far are my favorite, just because I actually have quite a bit in common with him, especially my taste in music. Which is fitting because I have both of the albums his band Fozzy have put out. 

     In Jericho's books, he talks about The Rock. Some of you may know him as Dwayne Johnson, or Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson (some other sophisticated made up name that you might call him (like sugar pecs or, peanut buns, I don't know how some of you work.) and he talks about the rock practically being shit on during his debut(which to be honest, shouda been blue chippered the fuck out of Survivor Series) and how the cream always rises to the top. 

     As I was standing there, stark (not Tony) naked as a jay-bird in the shower, it hit me. The Rock EARNED his right to walk away and pursuit Hollywood, Chris Jericho EARNED his right to go be a front man for a band, I sit and I wonder why my heyday hasn't come, I wish, hope and dream for my dreams to just POOF come true, but the never will, because what The Rock meant when he said "The cream always rises to the top" is those that work harder, longer, faster, better, and more consistent, they are the ones who deserve to have their dreams come true. Those are the people who get their Wrestlemania moment, Superbowl victory, World series win, Stanley cup raising. 

     It's a will to win, I don't know where to find it, but you can bet your ass that I will find it. 

Stupid? Who you calling stupid?

     Laddies and Lassies, welcome to the second best view in the universe, the View from the Sun. I recently posted a status on Facebook, saying that I was stupid. Stupid may be the wrong word to use in this situation. I don't really believe that I am stupid, I'm maybe, the king of procrastination? The king of wasting time? I'm not sure. I've got all this free time, and I'm truly wasting it, watching it fly by, disappear into the past, becoming my yesterday, turning into tomorrow. 

     What the real problem is, is I don't seem to be able to keep my thought process in order. It's like the 1 sheep 2 sheep cow, chicken, horse, Old McDonald had a farm, HEEEEEY MACARANA. I want to go to school, but I don't know what for. I want to lose weight, get healthy, but I don't know how. I want to learn all this stuff, but I don't have the resources. 

     I need to discipline myself. I need to learn discipline. 

     I like that I have friends that say, ask me for help, support, information etc. and when you ask, they disappear... Wonderful people you are. 

     Okay, I know that this is a short one today, but I will be back soon. Same Helios time, same Helios Channel.